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Category Archives: Marie Lavender
Heiresses in Love Trilogy by Marie Lavender💕 Spotlight & EXCLUSIVE eBook Bundle Giveaway 💕 (Historical Romance)
How Shopping Correlates with Dating and Relationships: a romance blogger post by multi-genre author Marie Lavender
How Shopping Correlates with Dating and Relationships
I love, love, love shopping…well, for almost anything! I can never be trusted with a credit card. 😉 Most of the time I resist temptation, but now and then, especially if I have some extra money on my hands, I indulge in one of my hobbies – shopping for clothes, or even books.
But whether you’re browsing online or in the store, shopping for clothing items is a whole other animal. At least with a book, you can be sure you will usually end up a satisfied reader. The only issue, for me at least, might be a bunch of glaring grammatical errors, or so much head-hopping that I get fictional whiplash.
Shopping for clothes, however, is a different story.
If you’re looking at stores on the internet, you have likely done your research already. Maybe you vetted the company for positive customer feedback. Looking over product reviews is never a bad policy.
When you’re dating, though, it’s not like you can ask your date’s exes how things went in the past, or what pitfalls to anticipate. It’s basically trial and error, right?
Sometimes that happens with shopping too. Just because you properly assessed the site, or even had prior experience with it – you got a great bargain and the product was offered in the right size – that doesn’t mean you’ll automatically love the shirt you bought every time. Hell, you won’t know anything until it arrives at your house and you can try it on. Maybe the color is off, or the shirt fits smaller or bigger than advertised. Every brand is different. The problem is there are no guarantees with any purchase.
Same thing goes with dating. Just because your date is handsome – or pretty – doesn’t mean you’ll be compatible. Life is about more than appearances alone. Can you at least carry on an intelligent conversation with this person? Can you tolerate their presence for longer than five or ten minutes? An hour? These are ways to test someone out.
If you try on a jacket in a store, you may not love it the same way a week later. If I’m just ‘meh’ about an article of clothing from that first moment in the dressing room, I’ll probably feel that way, or even worse later on. I may have a weakness for shopping, but I am also a highly discerning customer. I know when to go for the hard pass. I usually don’t jump to buy anything without a lot of forethought, or unless I am sure about it right away. Online purchases, though? It’s a toss-up as to whether I’ll be satisfied.
That happens with a relationship too. There is no better version than real, face-to-face human interaction. You can text, email or use social media messaging, even video chat all you want, and it still won’t replace learning about someone in person. Only then can you tell how it will work.
What about facades, though?
Just as there are scam artists selling faulty goods online – or leaving you empty-handed – and vendors selling their wares on the street, some people aren’t upfront about themselves with a dating situation. And I don’t mean the horror stories we see on the news. Please refer to Dating Connections’ article from November of 2017 about safely dating in a high-tech world. What I’m talking about it is a fact we often overlook…
Some of us make assumptions about people without knowing the truth. All we see is surface. Keep in mind that it goes both ways. A certain majority of people put up a facade to protect themselves from being hurt. Others may do so for darker reasons, or because they’re shallower than you realize. I think the key here is to take your time when getting to know someone. If you’re serious about dating – and not just playing the field – your instincts will guide you to the right answer, and the perfect fit will find you.
Have you ever bought a pair of shoes, and then a month or two later they break? Or, maybe it happened with a purse or your favorite shirt which tore right away. You found out it was made cheaply, or it just didn’t work for another reason.
Your dating journey is about trying on different relationships until you reach the right fit. Don’t give up easily, but don’t stay with someone for a long time just because you’re afraid to be alone either. If you’re not meant to be together, you’ll notice the signs or glaringly obvious red flags. Heartbreak is sometimes just a temporary obstacle to finding out what you want in this life.
But, I can’t emphasize this enough. Identity is everything when finding your soul mate.
Of course, we all come from different backgrounds, affording us various experiences. but the most important thing to remember is to know yourself well first. If you’re aware of all your likes and dislikes – a useful skill we often develop with shopping – that will go a long way toward understanding what you want in a relationship. It’s true that wisdom from experience – maybe going through a couple baddies – can also bring you the same result. But knowing who you are in and out will prevent you from making some crazy mistakes too.
Diversely, was there ever an item you didn’t usually wear, such as a scarf or hat, even a dress that you bought on impulse because something about it called to you? Perhaps later, you decided you really liked it after all, simply because it made you feel different. Consider the same with your search for a romantic partner. You may have an idea of the one for you, dreamt that person up in your head for years. However, don’t go looking with a certain image or impression in mind. The right person for you may be completely different, someone you didn’t anticipate at all. Yet, it somehow works.
Whereas we often focus on size, style and color with clothing, personality and compatibility are paramount in dating. Make sure you have a few things in common, but not everything. The best relationship still results in the occasional surprise, to keep things interesting.
It is pretty rare when you go to a store, try on an outfit, and everything about it works. Later, once you’ve purchased it, you wear your clothes with pride and this feels so natural that you never want to take it off. Falling in love and being in love are similar. It’s a little scary at first to trust someone with your true self, to know that you’re accepted. It’s okay to be yourself around this person, and you won’t be judged. No, life won’t always be beautiful or exciting every day, but you can rest assured that you both respect and love each other. Being in love is like coming home to the open arms that always want you, even if you drive your partner a little crazy sometimes. And vice versa.
Having a real relationship takes effort. Dating is work, plain and simple. We all know it; I think that’s why some people do their best to avoid a real relationship.
My advice? Be as discerning in your romantic relationships as you should be as a consumer, out there browsing stores in person or online. So…who is the one person you can still imagine sticking it out with you fifty years from now? Take a risk now and then, and don’t be afraid to look for the right signs that will lead you to the place where you belong.
At times we grab the nearest product out of necessity, and then end up disappointed by its contents later on. When you’re dating, don’t settle for a situation you don’t want, simply because you’re lonely or desperate for companionship. You’ll just be miserable in the long run. Believe me, I know.
Finding your soul mate won’t solve all your problems. You have to get yourself together too. Figure out what you want in life and go for it. But having the right person at your side will certainly make the roller coaster of life – the whole journey – a lot more tolerable.
Keep the faith. I know you can do this…
Host Blogger Bio
Multi-genre author of Victorian romance, UPON YOUR RETURN, and 23 other books. Reached the Top 10 Authors list on AuthorsDB.com for the last 4 years. Featured interview in the January 2018 issue of Womelle Magazine. The Heiresses in Love Trilogy made the TOP 10 on the Anthology category on the 2018 P&E Readers’ Poll, and BLOOD INSTINCTS reached TOP 10 status in the Romance category. The Heiresses in Love Trilogy and DIRECTIONS OF THE HEART both reached the semi-finalist round in the 2018 AuthorsDB Book Cover Contest. Voted TOP BLOGGER for 2018 on the Romance Lives Forever Blog. TOP 20 Authors of 2018 on Amy’s Bookshelf Reviews blog. DIRECTIONS OF THE HEART was nominated and made it past the first round in the 2018 Author Academy Awards. UPON YOUR LOVE and THE MISSING PIECE placed in the TOP 10 on the 2017 P&E Readers’ Poll. DIRECTIONS OF THE HEART was nominated for the 2017 Reader’s Choice Awards. The I Love Romance Blog became a finalist in StartDating DK’s Romance Blog Awards of 2017. ILRB landed on Feedspot’s 2017 TOP 100 Novel Blogs and TOP 100 Romance Blogs. DIRECTIONS OF THE HEART placed in the TOP 10 Books of 2017 on Amy’s Bookshelf Reviews blog. TOP 20 Authors of 2017 on Amy’s Bookshelf Reviews blog. Mystery Blogger Award for 2017. A to Z Blog Challenge Survivor in 2016. March 2016 Empress of the Universe title – winner of the “Broken Heart” themed contest and the “I Love You” themed contest on Poetry Universe. SECOND CHANCE HEART and A LITTLE MAGICK placed in the TOP 10 on the 2015 P&E Readers’ Poll. Nominated in the TRR Readers’ Choice Awards for Winter 2015. Poetry winner of the 2015 PnPAuthors Contest. The Versatile Blogger Award for 2015. Honorable Mention in the 2014 BTS Red Carpet Book Awards. Finalist and Runner-up in the 2014 MARSocial’s Author of the Year Competition. Honorable mention in the January 2014 Reader’s Choice Award. Liebster Blogger Award for 2013, 2014 and 2016. 2013 and 2014 Amazon Bestseller Ranking for UPON YOUR RETURN. Winner of the Great One Liners Contest on the Directory of Published Authors.
Marie Lavender lives in the Midwest with her family and two cats. She has been writing for a little over twenty-five years. She has more works in progress than she can count on two hands. Since 2010, Marie has published 24 books in the genres of historical romance, contemporary romance, romantic suspense, paranormal romance, dramatic fiction, fantasy, science fiction, mystery/thriller, literary fiction and poetry. She writes adult fiction, as well as occasional stories for children, and has recently started some young adult fiction. She has also contributed to several anthologies. Her current published series are The Heiresses in Love Series, The Eternal Hearts Series, The Magick Series, The Code of Endhivar Series and The Blood at First Sight Series.
Official Website: http://marielavender.com/
Social Media: https://www.facebook.com/marie.lavender.58
Creative Universal Reading List Link: https://books2read.com/rl/marielavendersbooks
Sign up for Marie’s Newsletter: http://bit.ly/1g3wO13
Follow her on BookBub for new release updates: https://www.bookbub.com/authors/marie-lavender
Have a lovely rest of your week, readers! 🙂
Two cool new book reviews for my romance novels! ♥
Awesome news! I just stumbled across two new reviews for my books…
HEIRESSES IN LOVE TRILOGY (boxed set)
April 13, 2019
Three box set that includes Upon Your Return, Upon Your Honor, and Upon Your Love. Three heiresses and their love life. Hours of reading pleasure for your enjoyment. A little maritime adventure and a whole lot of love. I read an advance reader copy and voluntarily chose to review. Well written with likeable characters and engaging stories.
BLOOD INSTINCTS – book two of the Blood at First Sight Series
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Hi, readers! April is here again! 🙂
To celebrate National Poetry Month, I decided to write a romantic poem, inspired by my relationship with my fiancé. Here it is:
Miles of Our Memories
A special anniversary approaches…
How many times have we crossed these miles?
More than I can count.
Distance separates us again this year,
but I know it will turn out all right.
I miss your arms wrapped around me,
your special scent in my nose.
I miss our unique closeness,
the quiet talks in the night as we lay there,
absorbing breaths and heartbeats.
I miss gazing at you across the table of a romantic meal,
even laughing as we dodged the puddles of a parking lot.
I miss the experiences we shared for years.
Surely we can get some of that back?
It has been too long, my love, since we…
Sat in a dark theater, hands entwined,
Strolled through a mall, pointing out the wares,
Tossed a ball down a lane, hoping to miss the gutters,
Had a picnic, chatting about all those simple things in life,
Went on a walk, hand in hand.
It has been far too long since our hearts were so connected, and we surrendered to the glee inside us.
For tonight, let’s cast aside our obligations.
Say you’ll travel with me to the stars and beyond,
where time doesn’t interfere with its incessant, haunting chime,
when we can be us again.
Join me and we’ll find our bliss,
a reprieve from the madness.
I know one day these chains of clock and mile won’t bind us,
and we can be free.
I live for the moment when I am yours,
tied with paper and mirrored hands.
We’ll confront this world together,
and then blend into a perfect union of well-matched souls.
I love you and miss you…
Yet I’d wait forever if the fates tried to keep us apart.
Nothing can break us, I swear.
We are stronger than the mere miles that threaten to split this bond.
And I am always,
© 2019, Marie Lavender.
Vote for a paranormal romance cover! 😉
I was just informed that Blood Instincts, my paranormal romance and book two of the Blood at First Sight Series, was nominated for the Cover of the Month Contest on AllAuthor. Yay!
So vote, vote, vote! ♥
Hi, readers! Today I wanted to inform you that one of my books, Heiresses in Love Trilogy, a Victorian maritime romance set, is up for grabs! 😀 This is a way to celebrate the new cover for the series. ♥
I am giving one free copy away in the Q&A contest on The Romance Reviews.
Hop on over to the site, and scroll down for my multiple choice question giveaway. This is a very simple contest…
How exciting, right? Plus, you have the chance to win prizes all month! 😉
YAY! If you’d like to see the full list of prizes, click here.
Congratulations in the contest today, and, as always, happy reading!
Hi, readers! Great news…Blood Instincts and the Heiresses in Love Trilogy were both nominated for the 21st Annual Preditors and Editors Critters’ Readers Poll!
So, help me out and cast your vote for each book…
You’ll find Blood Instincts, book two of the Blood at First Sight Series, listed in the Romance Category on the site here.
And the Heiresses in Love Series boxed set is listed on the Anthologies page here.
Reader votes wrap up on January 14th. There are SO many categories/genres in which you can cast your vote, including the Best EVER poll (of course I chose my favorite J.R. Ward novel)!
Happy voting, and wish me luck in the awards contest! 🙂
Happy New Year…and, of course, happy reading to all! ♥♥♥
Hi, readers! I have exciting news! ♥
This Thursday, August 30th, yours truly will appear on Thorne & Cross’s Haunted Nights Live! radio show. Favored hosts and writer duo Alistair Cross and Tamara Thorne are set to read a cool excerpt from my paranormal romance, Blood Instincts, and they’ll be interviewing me about my work. Yay!
It should be a fun time for all! I’ve been on their paranormal themed show in the past, and it was always an enjoyable experience.
You do not want to miss this radio interview, but if that is the case, it will be uploaded to the site afterward. Here is the link:
If you’d like to tune in live, you’ll find the details here on BlogTalkRadio, or you can find more updates on the Thorne & Cross blog, and their Facebook and Twitter pages. The show usually runs on Thursdays at 5 pm Pacific, 6 PM Mountain, 7 PM Central, 8 PM Eastern.
Here is the eternal link for the interview, though the aforementioned one should work until the end of the year…
Very exciting! Don’t forget, and enjoy your week! 😉