Tag Archives: emotional

Ten Effective Conversation-Starters for Couples: a guest post by Dr. B. Anne Hancock

10 Effective Conversation-Starters for Couples

 

Communication is an essential ingredient in any relationship. For couples, rich conversation makes their relationship delicious. It’s what builds connection and creates intimacy. For couples who’ve been together for a while keeping conversations fresh and interesting can take some effort.

Huy Phan, Unsplash

If you want to keep your conversations fresh and avoid telling each other the same stories, one effective solution is to try conversation-starters. By asking a few new questions, you’ll learn there’s always more to discover in the person you love.

Here are several ideas for opening a dialogue that reignites curiosity, affection and interaction:

  1. What’s your earliest childhood memory?

Rene Bernal, Unsplash

Most couples didn’t get to share childhood together, so there’s a wealth of experience just waiting to be tapped for conversation. Asking your partner about an early memory means you get to find out what left an imprint and why. You also gain insight into a part of his or her world that helped shape who your significant other is today.

  1. What do you remember most from our early days of dating?

Here’s a question that can take you both back to your budding love — that place where your connection began.

Created by Teksomolika – Freepik.com

Created by Pressfoto – Freepik.com

Even better, as you listen to your partner recall happy memories, it may surprise you with what’s remembered, not to mention help stir up fresh affection for you both.

Andre Furtado, pexels.com

  1. What’s one of your favorite memories from our wedding day?

Recalling milestones in your relationship is a great way to discuss the happy moments you’ve shared. If you’re married, your wedding day is especially meaningful. Ask your spouse what stands out about that memory and enjoy it from another perspective.

Ivan Cabañas, Unsplash

  1. If you were given the chance to relive one day of your life, what would it be and why?

Maybe your better half would want to revisit a major milestone such as graduation, the birth of a child or your wedding day. Perhaps he or she would like to relive a day with a parent or grandparent who passed away or even an  event from high school or college. You’ll never know until you ask.

Karl Fredrickson, Unsplash

  1. Do you have any dreams you wish you could pursue? Are there ways I could help you try them?

Most adults have abandoned dreams still lurking somewhere inside them. Do you know what dream your partner longs to pursue? It could be something outlandish and surprising and you’ll get to be playful and imagine together. Or, it could be practical, such as taking a class, and you can be the encouraging voice to help your partner get right on it.

30daysreplay (PR & Marketing), Unsplash

  1. When was the last time you felt appreciated?

People don’t always verbalize their feelings unprompted. By asking your partner about what has encouraged and affirmed him or her, you may be surprised at what you hear. You’ll also learn how you can offer up additional support.

Created by Bearfotos – Freepik.com

  1. When was the last time you felt sad?

Milada Vigerova, Unsplash

Likewise, if your partner lets you in and tells you what’s been hurtful and discouraging, you’ll get a sense of what’s truly important. What prompts tears? What feels significant enough to change a mood? By asking…and listening, you get a chance to learn.

  1. If you could turn back the clock ten years, what would you tell your younger self?

This question offers your significant other a chance to assess and evaluate a decade of life, giving you a window into his or her regrets and wisdom gained. This can also start a conversation about moving forward with new information and insight.

  1. Say you won an all-expense paid trip to anywhere in the world, and you can’t consult me before picking the destination. Where would you go?

Paua May, Unsplash

Find out what travel destinations are on your partner’s dream list. Couples who have spent a long time together will often be so used to asking each other about preferences that it’s easy to miss what each one likes. Let your partner know you care about what he or she wants.

  1. If you had to pick three people, who would you say you most admire?

There’s a lot to be said for admiration. The people you highly regard are often the people you imitate — intentionally or not. Ask your partner who he or she looks up to and why. You’ll discover what qualities he or she values.

Hatham, Unsplash

The 10 ideas listed are merely the beginning for prompting meaningful conversations with your partner. Be curious. Ask questions. Invite discussion and keep learning. Continuing to discover each other is what helps your relationship feel alive and exciting year after year.

Hannah Cook, Unsplash

Wow! These are such great tips!

Thank you, Anne, for this illuminating article… ♥♥♥

Guest Blogger Bio

Anne Hancock, PsyD, is a prominent relationship therapist and founder of Wellness Counseling Center. A licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Hancock specializes in working with couples and families. She has a doctorate in Psychology and a master’s degree in Marriage and Family Therapy. Hancock always works from a wellness-oriented, non-pathologizing point of view — which means no blame, no shame. In addition to couples counseling services, Hancock also conducts personalized two-and-a-half-day couples intensives.

Links

Website:  https://thewellnesscounselingcenter.com/

Blog:  https://thewellnesscounselingcenter.com/articles/

Professional Background:  https://thewellnesscounselingcenter.com/team/anne-hancock/

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/banne.hancock

https://www.facebook.com/pages/B-Anne-Hancock-PsyD/436325916561152

Twitter:  https://twitter.com/WellnessCNSLNG

LinkedIn:  https://www.linkedin.com/in/annehancockpsyd

Instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/wellnesscounselingcenter/

 

Thanks again! We hope to see you back on ILRB sometime. 

As always, happy reading, everyone! 😉 Have a great weekend!

Advertisements

Leave a comment

Filed under Blogging, Contemporary, Dating Tips, Event, Guest Writer, Hope, Love, Lovers Like Us, Message, Readers, reflections, Relationships, Romance, romantic ideas

New Release Feature: Directions of the Heart by Marie Lavender

I am pleased to announce a great book release by well, yours truly! My modern romantic drama collection, Directions of the Heart, officially released this week!

Yay! Awesome! :)

When a new book comes out, it’s always an exciting time for an author!

I am thrilled to show Directions of the Heart to readers today. ♥

This is the blurb for Directions of the Heart:

Embark on a remarkable journey of drama, romance, and passion…

In all of these amazing stories, there’s one burning question…is love worth the risk?

Without You

Reece and Jenna are two childhood friends separated by time and distance. Can they find a way to heal their bond, or perhaps forge a new one?

Strange Heat

Spurred by her friend’s close call, Victoria decides to take a risk and prove the lifestyle she led was her downfall. But as Tory sinks deeper into the tumultuous abyss of desire with the mysterious Rick, can she climb back out before it’s too late? Or does she even want to?

Memories

Struggling to run her family’s farm on her own, Sadie takes on a hired hand, Matt. As they grow closer, so does the danger. Someone wants her legacy. Can they combat this new threat, as well as the demons of the past, before Sadie loses everything, including her life?

A Touch of Dawn

Caitlyn thought she’d be in the dark forever. But with the light came Jack, the police consultant who found her. Can they take a journey of healing together, or will Caitlyn retreat into the darkness of her mind, where she lived for so long?

(CONTENT WARNING: With an abuse awareness theme in this collection, there may be triggers here for past trauma sufferers. However, HEAs are guaranteed.)

And here are some teasers to entice you with.

Here’s the book trailer:

What people are saying about this book:

There were family and friends but also some depraved people in the stories, heartache, fear, sadness, tears, anger, hate, hope, a chance for happiness, healing and peace. There was a nice flow to each of the stories and the characters were multifaceted. What you saw wasn’t always what you got and you had to delve deeper under the surface. All the stories had nice closure and I felt the endings were realistic.” – JoAnne on Goodreads

“Your theme and storytelling are very eloquently tied. I know you put warning labels upfront, but I love your writing, knew you had a happy ending if I would just be brave enough to try to get there despite the scary feels, and I was well rewarded. Your best story ever, hands down!!!” – Belinda, beta reader

“Sensitive issues tactfully interwoven into beautiful stories…I really believe that honest writing puts us in touch with who we really are. As humans, one of our flaws is that we prefer to live in denial about our dark side. But everyone has one and I don’t have the words to express how much I loved reading this unrestrained book. ” – Vivienne, early reviewer

Purchase Links:

Universal Amazon link:  https://bookgoodies.com/a/B071WVZZPV

myBook.to/DoH

B&N:  https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/directions-of-the-heart-marie-lavender/1126548251

Smashwords:  https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/729271

Kobo:  https://www.kobo.com/us/en/ebook/directions-of-the-heart-a-romantic-drama-collection

CreateSpace:  https://www.createspace.com/7239124

 

I hope you all get a chance to read this romance! 🙂

Readers, don’t forget to pick up a copy of Directions of the Heart!

Author Bio

 

Bestselling multi-genre author of UPON YOUR RETURN and 21 other books. Mystery Blogger Award for 2017. A to Z Blog Challenge Survivor in 2016. March 2016 Empress of the Universe title – winner of the “Broken Heart” themed contest and the “I Love You” themed contest on Poetry Universe. SECOND CHANCE HEART and A LITTLE MAGICK placed in the TOP 10 on the 2015 P&E Readers’ Poll. Nominated in the TRR Readers’ Choice Awards for Winter 2015. Poetry winner of the 2015 PnPAuthors Contest. The Versatile Blogger Award for 2015. Honorable Mention in the 2014 BTS Red Carpet Book Awards. Finalist and Runner-up in the 2014 MARSocial’s Author of the Year Competition. Honorable mention in the January 2014 Reader’s Choice Award. Liebster Blogger Award for 2013 and 2014. Top 10 Authors on AuthorsDB.com. Winner of the Great One Liners Contest on the Directory of Published Authors.

Marie Lavender lives in the Midwest with her family and three cats. She has been writing for a little over twenty-five years. She has more works in progress than she can count on two hands. Since 2010, Marie has published 22 books in the genres of historical romance, contemporary romance, romantic suspense, paranormal romance, fantasy, science fiction, mystery/thriller, dramatic fiction, literary fiction and poetry. She has also contributed to several multi-author anthologies. Her current series are The Heiresses in Love Series, The Magick Series, The Blood at First Sight Series and The Code of Endhivar Series.

Author Links

Website:  http://marielavender.com/

Blogs:  http://marielavender.blogspot.com/

http://marielavenderbooks.blogspot.com/

https://iloveromanceblog.wordpress.com/

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/marie.lavender.58

https://www.facebook.com/MarieAnnLavender

Twitter:  https://twitter.com/marielavender1

Amazon Author Page:  Author.to/MarieLavender

Goodreads:  https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/6938764.Marie_Lavender

Youtube/Book Trailers:  https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCJu8HjRVYCFOqcIoX6ZxdqQ/videos

 

Happy reading, everyone! 😉

2 Comments

Filed under Authors, Book Release, Books, Contemporary, Drama, Event, Fiction, Marie Lavender, New Adult, new release, Readers, Romance, Stories, western, Writing

“Dream with Me” – a poem

Dream with Me

My yearning for you is strong,

something I’ve never felt for anyone else…

There are nights like tonight,

when I ache so much for you that sleep eludes me.

With bated breath

I remember our last embrace,

savoring your arms around me,

the warmth of your body against mine,

your chest beneath my ear as I witness the steady beats of your heart,

a constant comfort.

I recall our quiet talks about nothing and everything,

our shared laughter.

You’re the only one who reaches me on all levels,

physical and emotional.

But the convenience of technology – firing up a text thread or dialing your number –

is a poor substitution for the real thing.

The truth is

I need you in my life.

It’s a forever kind of thing.

With the storm striking outside – rain pattering against the panes of glass,

the occasional rumble of thunder

and each curse of lightning –

despite it all, I’ll do my best to keep you safe in my heart tonight.

Soon,

maybe not tomorrow,

possibly in a week or so,

I’ll see you again and then our bond will be reaffirmed.

We’ll be one once more.

There are few things in this world that last,

even fewer powers resilient against time, hate or destruction.

But, love? Love will stand up to anything.

If you were lost to me,

I’d go anywhere,

do anything to search,

to find you again.

You mean that much to me.

It has nothing to do with loneliness.

This is about two hearts that were born for each other,

Two halves of a whole.

When we met, we spoke like old friends.

It was different yet utterly natural.

And no matter what happens in our lives,

this bond cannot bend or be broken.

This is love.

So close your eyes tonight and think of me, my love.

Dream with me…

Imagine a place of peace,

with lush, green land,

endless blue skies and beautiful seas.

A place where we’re together, dancing clumsily,

laughing and resting in one another’s arms.

Keep me in your heart, the same way I keep you.

I’ll see you soon,

on the other side of this hazy, slumberous journey,

to a world where eternity resides.

I wake to your face,

your warm smile,

the sound of your soothing breaths beside me.

And I know this is right where I belong.

© Marie Lavender, 2017.

Leave a comment

Filed under Love, love poem, Marie Lavender, Message, poem, poems, Poetry, Readers, Relationships, Romance, Writing