Tag Archives: perfection

Special Feature: What Does Romance Mean to Me? by Ricardo Mejías

Hi, readers! I am beyond pleased to announce a very special post today on ILRB. Recently, I asked both authors and romance readers to come to me with their responses to this big question: “What Does Romance Mean to Me?” I was genuinely interested in what made us all tick, what continued to draw us to the genre. Why do we love “love” so much? I wanted to dig deep into the heart of each person. And I’ve gotten some incredible feedback. Today is the next post in this series.

So, without further ado, let’s turn the mic over to author Ricardo Mejías, who has a few things to say about the question at hand.

Romance in a relationship is a lot like dancing. Not the spontaneous kind, but one that requires practice. There’s an art to it, and when it comes to art there is always an ideal form one aspires to; dancers appear surreal to those watching; elegant in motion, graceful, years of hard work made to look effortless. But no one can be perfect. They can have moments, beautiful and brief moments that take our breath away, but even perfect moments are only meant to be remembered, not lived. And this can be disheartening, always trying to be at your best, straining to get it right.

This is only one point of view. Just as there are many ways to dance, there are many ways to interact with love. But for me, romance is a passionate exercise in living outside yourself. It is learning to dance with your partner. Discovering how they move, the beauty in their steps so refreshingly new and yet complementary to your own; figuring out ways to glide and sashay across the floor, together; knowing you are only as strong as your partner, savoring in the ache of your muscles, relishing in the many mistakes that will follow because that means there is still work to be done.

Created by Teksomolika – Freepik.com

Ineffable, tinged in sadness, made to look elegant and is in constant motion, forever practicing with the one you love on a vast stage. It is hard and never truly ends. It is sweat and tears. It is earned.

I find the more beautiful an idea or object, the greater the weight of sorrow it carries. It can be easy to fall into the fantasy of pure romance, with stories ending on a note of warmth and comfort because they, by nature, necessitate a beginning and end. But we do not live in chapters, and because we inherently know this we can be pulled even more towards that ideal—ironically adding to the pain we seek to avoid.

My writing has always been infused with this sentiment. Romanticizing love’s other half, celebrating the elegant figure of Imperfection but always keeping the bigger picture in mind; you may trip and hurt yourself in the process, but it is worth it. There are very few happy endings to my stories. My prose is never settled, never really content with itself. It can always be better, and a lot of times I hate it. But I keep writing, and when I edit my work I am flirting, knowing I will always come back for more even if it is not exactly how I want it, that sometimes I may have writer’s block and sometimes I will have so much to say but no words to write them down, yet the page will always be waiting for me, whispering gently: there will be moments…brief, perfect moments to remember.

And how incredibly romantic is that? I fall for it every time.

So true! Life is a lot like writing; there are often hurdles to overcome, but in the end it is a worthy endeavor. I believe the same about romance. Those very real, normal moments and struggles combine with the small, beautiful, perfect ones to create a canvas. And from that you can build a future with the person that calls to your soul. 😉
Thanks for stopping by with your fascinating guest post, Ricardo! A pleasure to have you here! ♥
Guest Bio

Ricardo Mejías discovered his love for prose in his senior year of high school while taking a creative writing course. He majored in Creative Writing at SUNY New Paltz with a double minor in philosophy. Wanting to learn more about the publishing industry, he pursued an editorial career and worked at Disney Hyperion as an Assistant Editor. Currently residing in New York with his wife, he’s now looking to explore new careers as well as develop his writing and poetry crafts.

Wait, we’re not quite finished!

So, I put the question to you as a reader today as well. What does the word ‘romance’ really mean for you? Is ‘romance’ a driving force in your life? How have your beliefs about romantic relationships informed your own relationships? Perhaps seeing other couples (parents or friends) were some kind of influence. By reading romance novels, does that help to reaffirm things for you?

If you’d like to participate in this special feature, please contact me at marieannlavender@gmail.com and I’ll schedule a spot for you. As you can tell from the schedule on the right hand side of the page, we’re getting booked fast, but don’t hesitate to join in! You do not need to be a writer or author. We want to hear from anyone. We’d love to get your take on how you feel about romance, and why you keep reading our books! ♥♥♥ 

Thanks again, Ricardo, for giving us your take on what romance has come to mean to you. Lovely! 😀

Readers, stay tuned for our next special feature on this topic when author K.C. Sprayberry visits us on May 9th! Yay! 🙂

We may have other posts before then, though.

Have a great weekend, everyone!

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Filed under Authors, Blogging, Books, Event, Fiction, Guest Writer, Love, Message, Poetry, Readers, Romance, Writers, Writing

Special Feature: What Does Romance Mean to Me? by Lashanta Charles

Hi, readers! I am beyond pleased to announce a very special post today on ILRB. Recently, I asked both authors and romance readers to come to me with their responses to this big question: “What Does Romance Mean to Me?” I was genuinely interested in what made us all tick, what continued to draw us to the genre. Why do we love “love” so much? I wanted to dig deep into the heart of each person. And I’ve gotten some incredible feedback. Today is the next post in this series.

So, without further ado, let’s turn the mic over to author Lashanta Charles, who has a few things to say about the question at hand.

For me, romance means life and insanity. It’s said that insanity is constantly doing the same things over and over, hoping that you’ll get a different outcome. Isn’t that what we do in our never-ending quest to find that perfect romance? In life, we search and we search and then we search just a little bit more, always trying to find that one person who completes us. That one person who will make us feel cherished. Appreciated. Needed. We want someone or something that will give us purpose, other than living, other than existing. And what could be better than that feeling of surprise and wonder that we get when we’re presented with just because gifts? Or when we’ve had the day from hell and our significant other makes it an all about you night?

Created by Teksomolika – Freepik.com

We spend so much time vying for that moment where we can have that goofy smile and starry-eyed look, yet we fail to realize that it isn’t always perfect, nor is it always easy. Romance is just as much work as love, and what’s that old saying – love is never easy. Well, my friends, neither is romance. I’ve centered my writing career on the highs and lows of romance, and even in the fictional words and characters I create, it isn’t all unicorns and rainbows. I absolutely live for my next book boyfriend, no matter if it’s one I create or if it’s one that another author creates. Yet, knowing they aren’t real and neither are those scenes where they go all in and confess their undying love in the most amazing way possible, I still yearn for it. I swoon. I cheer them on. I laugh with them and I cry with them and when it’s all said and done, I do it all over again – INSANITY!!

I began writing romance novels because, at the time, I was missing that aspect in my life. I saw romance as the elusive and dangerous creature that I wanted to hunt down and make my tame little pet. I wanted so badly to feel the romance that I’d read about in countless books or saw in the plethora of movies I’ve watched. I wanted my very own hero to come and save me (who cares if I wasn’t in danger), my very own bad boy who reformed his ways just to make me happy, my very own prince to whisk me off to his castle where I would eventually become a queen and rule by his side.

I never got that! Insane, right?? Because I totally deserve that! What I did get was my husband who I’ve been married to for nearly a decade, and I love that man like it’s nobody’s business. Is he as romantic as I had hoped? Not a chance in hell! Would I trade him for that hero, bad boy, or prince? You bet your sweet bottom I wouldn’t! He is mine and I am his and we are perfectly flawed, but together we are perfectly phenomenal. He makes me laugh, yet he makes me cry. He makes me feel appreciated, but manages to forget things that I think are important (news flash, I’m so much worse at this than he is – guess who forgot our anniversary last year . . . not him). He tests my patience even more than our kids do, but his soul is beautiful and he chose to share that astounding soul with little old me. How romantic is that, right?!

Adapted from vector created by Freepik

I still read just about any romance novel I can get my hands on, no matter how cheesy (I’m a sucker for insta-love and paranormal romances with the whole one true mate – le sigh) and I still watch the movies with perfect romantically nice endings, getting lost in those fictional worlds, but once they’re over I’m right back to my reality, my husband. And I always realize that romance isn’t something that’s set in stone. It isn’t a written rule that everyone has to follow. It’s just you and your relationship, regardless of if that’s with a real person, one you’ve read about, or one you saw in a movie. It’s all yours and it’s what you have, so enjoy it to the fullest. And, in the meantime, if you’re in desperate need of a book boyfriend, I encourage you to meet Nico…

So true! I happen to believe that those very normal moments are exactly what help to encourage and strengthen a romantic bond. If you can get through that, while slowing down occasionally to appreciate the little things we often take for granted, then you can handle anything. 😉
Thanks for stopping by with your fascinating guest post, Lashanta! Lovely to have you here! ♥
Guest Bio

Lashanta Charles was born and raised in the small town of Orangeburg, SC. She has always been an avid reader of all genres, but Romance has always been her true love and is what inspired her to pursue a writing career. In high school, she began letting her classmates read the short stories that she would write and based off their feedback, her passion for writing pushed her to become a published author. She published her debut novel, Lovely Lies, in 2013 and released the sequel, Lovely Lies 2, in February 2014. Her third novel, Splitting Karma, was released in October 2014. She lives in Tacoma, WA, with her husband and three children and also serves in the US Army. She’s a home body who enjoys SLEEPING, reading, eating, SLEEPING, white chocolate mochas, sexy alien romances, SLEEPING, and of course, writing. Oh, and she hates spiders; they’re extremely creepy…why do they need eight legs?!

Wait, we’re not quite finished!

So, I put the question to you as a reader today as well. What does the word ‘romance’ really mean for you? Is ‘romance’ a driving force in your life? How have your beliefs about romantic relationships informed your own relationships? Perhaps seeing other couples (parents or friends) were some kind of influence. By reading romance novels, does that help to reaffirm things for you?

If you’d like to participate in this special feature, please contact me at marieannlavender@gmail.com and I’ll schedule a spot for you. As you can tell from the schedule on the right hand side of the page, we’re getting booked fast, but don’t hesitate to join in! You do not need to be a writer or author. We want to hear from anyone. We’d love to get your take on how you feel about romance, and why you keep reading our books! ♥♥♥ 

Thanks again, Lashanta, for giving us your take on what romance itself has come to mean to you. Lovely! 😀

Readers, stay tuned for our next special feature on this topic when author Ricardo Mejías visits us on May 4th! Yay! 🙂

We’ll have other posts before then, though.

Have a great weekend, everyone!

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Filed under Authors, Blogging, Books, Event, Fiction, Guest Writer, Love, Message, Readers, Romance, sports romance, Writers, Writing