Addressing Anxiety During Tough Times with the Help of Talkspace: a guest post by Talkspace

Addressing Anxiety During Tough Times with the Help of Talkspace

 

Are you in a relationship? Do you find yourself becoming overwhelmed with anxiousness when you and your significant other run into a disagreement?

Created by Bearfotos – Freepik.com

You are not alone. Arguing with a loved one tends to bring on much more stress than usual because of how emotionally attached you are to that person. You care what they think above most because their choices can affect your life immensely and vice versa.

Created by Yanalya – Freepik.com

Anxiety may prove overwhelming. The heightened level of panic and nervousness anxiety induces can cause everything from poor concentration, irritability, labored breathing, to chest pains. The over anxiousness associated with anxiety might increase significantly during tough times. That’s somewhat understandable and expected. Anxiety shares a connection with feelings of wanting to something troubling to be over with. Anxiety sufferers definitely want to get tough, strenuous times past them as quickly as possible. Things don’t always move fast so they may seek help for their anxiety. Anxiety sufferers may find it valuable to explore several ways to cut down on both stress and an anxious state of mind.

One way to deal with a tough situation involves determining how long the situation could feasibly last. Not every bad situation goes on forever. Understanding that the bad times may soon pass could ease tensions about the situation. Granted, certain tough scenarios could very well last a long time or be permanent. While difficult to accept, such facts shouldn’t deter someone from trying to see the positive side of any difficult or trying time in life.

Created by Freepik

An acceptance of the difficulty of the situation might also help matters. This is not a suggestion to embrace feelings of helplessness. Rather, take acceptance in the fact that certain things just might be far outside of your control. By understanding the reality of the situation, more effective steps could be employed to deal with the times.

TalkSpace shows that many more steps likely exist than you realize. TalkSpace affords the opportunity to contact a therapist by way of smartphone texting. People use their smartphones for all sorts of different purposes. The devices open many doors for expanded communications. Through TalkSpace, those communications now include working with a therapist. Proactive steps such as contacting a therapist may help remove feelings of helplessness and restore some control.

Taking action remains important, but another point must be made here. What you don’t do is equally as important as what you should do. In particular, avoiding anything capable of heightening feelings of anxiety probably would be a good idea. For example, the next time you find yourself in a heated conversation with your significant other, take a moment to draw large, deep breaths, compose your thoughts and explain to your partner in a calm manner.

Created by Jcomp – Freepik.com

Created by Bearfotos – Freepik.com

Dwelling on a difficult situation won’t exactly assist the process of calming down. Poor dietary choices don’t help matters either. Reaching for highly-caffeinated beverages my drive anxiety levels up due to a stimulation effect. People don’t always realize caffeine can heighten anxiety, which is why they may not curtail the use of it. Problems sometimes follow.

Andrew Neel, Unsplash

Anxiety makes life difficult at times. Anxiety sufferers can take solace in the fact that ways to address anxiety exist. These ways include both self-help strategies and seeking the assistance of others.

Nice! These are some helpful tips for anyone whose anxiety is starting to disrupt their relationship. Who hasn’t experienced stress that just got too overwhelming, especially nowadays when we are pulled in so many different directions?

Thank you, Talkspace, for such great advice! ♥♥♥

Guest Blogger Bio

With Talkspace online therapy, anyone can get therapy without traveling to an office – and for significantly less money than traditional therapy. Start therapy now with a licensed therapist that understands how you live your life today.

Links

Website:  http://www.talkspace.com/

Blog:  http://www.talkspace.com/blog/

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/Talkspacetherapy

Twitter:  https://twitter.com/talkspace

Google+:  https://plus.google.com/+talkspace

LinkedIn:  https://www.linkedin.com/company/talkspace-online-therapy

Pinterest:  https://www.pinterest.com/talkspace/

Instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/talkspace/

 

Thanks again! We hope to see you back on ILRB sometime. 

As always, happy reading, everyone! 😉 Have a great weekend!

Advertisements

5 Things Everyone Should Know About Dating A Single Parent: a guest post by Dating Connections

5 Things Everyone Should Know About Dating A Single Parent

 

Dating nowadays is undoubtedly not a walk in the park, yet dating a single parent introduces a whole new level of hard. Now, we don’t want to imply that it isn’t a worthy and rewarding experience, because it is; it’s just that it requires far more attention, dedication, and empathy.

Namely, there are a quite a few things you should be aware of should you start dating a single parent. As you already assume, it’s entirely different compared to other sorts of dating, such as senior dating for example.

Created by Asierromero – Freepik.com

 

So, what are in our opinion the top five things you should be concerned about when dating a single mom or dad, you ask? Just read the following paragraphs, and you’ll get the idea.

#1 Being A Single Parent is Overwhelming, So Good Date-Planning skills Are A Must.

Single parents usually, but not necessarily, assume the role of both parents. What you should do now is take a moment to picture how often an average individual takes for granted the help they get from the spouse. Or how easily he/she complains about not getting enough sleep or help around the house, often forgetting about the challenges imposed on single parents.

So, in the context of dating and translated to real life, this is how an average single parent usually thinks:

• It’s the end of the day, and they are finally available for you, so they want to have a fulfilling and meaningful date that will recharge their batteries.
  

  Created by Freepik

• They’re looking forward to it and might have a bit higher expectations because they know it can help them get energized appropriately for the following day, with all its challenges and small setbacks that might arise along the way.

We believe that this example perfectly illustrates the possible pattern of a single parent’s way of thinking while teaching us to be creative and caring when organizing dates at the same time.

#2 They Have to Plan Ahead.

Yes, they have to hire a babysitter and make plans far more in advance in order to enjoy their alone/date time. Childless people usually can’t grasp how it’s like because they haven’t walked in a single parent’s shoes.

Free Photos, Pixabay

On the other hand, you should be aware you’re not entitled to plan your partner’s schedule on their behalf whatsoever since it can cause issues, misunderstandings, and other additional problems.

No, no one is blaming you for wanting to head out for a romantic getaway with your partner, but you should understand that this isn’t always possible because their kid might have flu, or the babysitter might have canceled on short notice, just to mention a few possible reasons.

In this light, you’ll often need to be ready to come up with some viable alternatives that will be equally pleasant and will sometimes include your partner’s kid/s.

#3 Say Bye-bye to Spontaneity.

Hitting clubs until wee hours and struggling with massive hangovers is apparently not an option for your partner anymore, regardless of their age.

Created by Freepik

They have to be fully functional the next day since children – especially if younger – require constant commitment and attention.

So, if you can make it work for both sides where you get to enjoy the nightlife without hurting your relationship – great! If not, perhaps it would be a good time to reconsider both your personal desires and mutual goals to determine whether you’re on the same page.

#4 Your Relationship will be Different…

…And there’s no point denying it. Caring profoundly about your partner doesn’t mean buying expensive gifts and taking them out to fancy dinners; it understands accepting them both as a parent and person you’re dating.

It can be confusing at times, we know, and no one expects you to be a parent to their children because they obviously proved they could live their life independently before you entered the scene.

Created by Freepik

Creating a genuine and unique bond with their kid, on the other hand, will reassure them that you’re a right partner for them.

Finally, kids can always tell if you’re a fake and won’t be afraid to express their opinion about it.

#5 They Will Sometimes Fail to Grasp Your Position.

Yes, they won’t do it on purpose, but you should always keep in mind that the person you’re dating will probably struggle to invest equally in their parental efforts, career, and house and that day only lasts 24 hours.

Sure, they might be getting occasional help from family or even an ex-spouse (if they separated on good terms, of course) but sometimes, it might just not be enough.

Created by Asierromero – Freepik.com

Consequently, this can lead to increased levels of stress and anxiety that might have a negative impact on your relationship. If this be the case, keep in mind that healthy and straightforward communication can be vital to solving this problem and is otherwise a basis of every stable relationship.

Are you dating a single parent at the moment? Have you done it in the past? We’d love to know all about it so don’t hesitate to share your thoughts in the comment section below!

Created by Freepik

Nice! These are some helpful tips for anyone who has their eye on a single parent. You definitely need to take more into account with this type of relationship, because it’s not just the two of you in this…

Take it from me. I tried dating a single parent once.

Thank you, Dating Connections, for such great advice! ♥♥♥

Guest Blogger Bio

Dating Connections is a site that offers the opportunity for you to explore a variety of dating tips, previous relationship experiences and interact with other people!

Links

Website:  http://datingconnections.org/

Blog:  http://datingconnections.org/category/blog/

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/datingconnections/

Twitter:  https://twitter.com/BoyanUlv

Google+:  https://plus.google.com/u/0/101423157749445118069

 

Thanks again! We hope to see you back on ILRB sometime. 

As always, happy reading, everyone! 😉 Have a great weekend!

Unique Yet Perfect Date Ideas That Won’t Break the Bank: a guest post by Dating Connections

Unique Yet Perfect Date Ideas That Won’t Break the Bank

 

You might not have even realized that BBW dating was made for you until you met your perfect plus-size lady who turned out to be everything you’d ever wanted and more.

Renepfister, Pixabay

That being said, with as much baggage as any of us have on our shoulders, dating someone new, trying to impress them and give them the world despite the constraints of everyday life isn’t always the easiest thing to do. However, it’s the thought that counts even if the execution is not as splendid as you’d like. At the same time, there are still things you can do to show not only that your heart is in the right place, but also to go a step further and be creative (say, frugal) in your ways of showing how much you care. Today, we explore several unique date ideas that guarantee a good time, and ensure you don’t break the bank in the process.

#1. Seeing a Local Band

If you and your girl like the same kind of music, catching a live show by a local band instead of a world renowned performer is a very unique option to dating on a budget. She might like heavy metal, and even if that is not your first choice, if you can enjoy that kind of music, getting her two tickets to a local heavy metal gig that takes place at a small venue with cheap beer guarantees she’ll appreciate your effort to be creative as you try to get her to fall even more in love with you.

Created by Photoangel – Freepik.com

If the band happens to kill it, your chances will certainly increase!

#2. Taking a Bus Tour

It’s great when you can get two tickets to Mexico on short notice, and take your lady on a 7-day vacation to a 5-star resort, but when you can’t do that keep in mind there are lots of other ways to get out of town, and spend some time exploring new places.

Created by Onlyyouqj – Freepik.com

For instance, remember buses? Those large vehicles that transport people from one place to the next? Well, buses are pretty affordable and you can get two tickets for a daily tour of a sight that is a few hours away from your hometown. You’ll be doing something special for you both – taking a break from the everyday worries weighing you down, and spending quality time together doing something you don’t get to do that often.

#3. Cooking at Home + Going Out for Dessert

The word ‘date’ usually implies going out, but it doesn’t have to be so.

Created by Freepik

You can stay in and have a wonderful time provided you allocate a certain amount of time to each other only, like you would at a restaurant. What you can do is pretty simple – you can prepare a lovely meal for the two of you that you’ll share over a bottle of wine, and once finished you can go out for a walk and get ice cream! You can go out for dessert, as in go to a patisserie and order a waffle or some pancakes, and merge your at-home dinner with getting sweets downtown or wherever you and your honey like to go.

Created by Teksomolika – Freepik.com

You’ll save money and ‘go out’ on a date at the same time.

#4. A Stroll Through the Park

Leah Kelley, Pexels.com

Among the weather permitting options, there is always a stroll through the park especially if you and your date are into art, or say, photography. You can take wonderful photos together of the changing seasons, and create stunning posts that you’ll share with your community, or you can start your own personal collection of how things are changing around you as the two of you remain stronger than ever.

To top it all off, you can make sandwiches and lemonade at home, and have a picnic after the walk tires you out.

Created by Teksomolika – Freepik.com

#5. Midnight Bike Ride

Turning a date into a workout session is not only unique, but it’s super healthy, and breaking a sweat together usually means your date ends in the shower. But that aside, going to the gym is not as exciting as staying physically active as you spend quality time together. Enter a midnight bike ride.

Everton Vila, Unsplash

At night, there is virtually no traffic so you can bike through the downtown core, provided it’s not the weekend or you don’t live in a big city because if you do, there is just no escaping traffic. But that aside, you can bike through your neighborhood or go wherever you like, and if this idea is outside of your comfort zone, even better because you’ll feel the rush of adrenaline that will bring you closer to your partner.

Nice! These are some helpful tips for couples who are trying to save money these days. Which, I bet, falls on many of us! As for the last point, definitely wear brighter colors for bike-riding, just in case. Safety is everything…

Thank you, Dating Connections, for such great advice! ♥♥♥

Guest Blogger Bio

Dating Connections is a site that offers the opportunity for you to explore a variety of dating tips, previous relationship experiences and interact with other people!

Links

Website:  http://datingconnections.org/

Blog:  http://datingconnections.org/category/blog/

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/datingconnections/

Twitter:  https://twitter.com/BoyanUlv

Google+:  https://plus.google.com/u/0/101423157749445118069

 

Thanks again! We hope to see you back on ILRB sometime. 

As always, happy reading, everyone! 😉 Have a great weekend!

6 Surprising Ways to Communicate Better With Your Partner: a guest post by Dating Connections

6 Surprising Ways to Communicate Better With Your Partner

 

Good communication is the foundation of any stable relationship. In long-term relationships that are fulfilling and functioning on a day-to-day basis, we often forget to take a step back and treat them like living organisms that they are, ones that could not survive without constant, highly efficient communication. Whether you’re into long-term dating, cowboy dating, casual flings on trips abroad or you’ve settled down with your significant other a long time ago, we bet you’ll find our communication tips useful and adequate in any romantic situation.

Created by Freepik

#1 – Learn A New Skill Together

Take a cooking or a photography class together, learn some Spanish or take a dance lesson. Wherever your interests lie, taking a new class and learning new things together can deepen the bond between you and your partner, and as a result strengthen communication.

Created by Freepik

You’ll spend more time together, and have new topics to discuss as you master a new skill set.

#2 – Share The Small Stuff

Did a bus driver say something funny to you today? Did you see your spouse’s favorite car painted pink with a set of eyelashes? Share the small, insignificant things, and don’t shy away from small talk. Keeping things serious between you two all the time can get pretty tiring, whereas the stuff that doesn’t matter much can brighten the mood and loosen the tension.

Created by Asier_relampagoestudio – Freepik.com

#3 – Listen More Carefully

Listening to your partner attentively is one of the most important things you can do for your relationship. If you want to show your partner you’re all ears when they’re speaking, encourage them to share their thoughts with you, and comment on them, but not by changing the subject to you. Ask questions, add something, and whatever you do, don’t interrupt them or say they’re too scattered, you can’t follow, or they talk about too much unnecessary detail and they’ll get to their point around this time tomorrow.

Created by Kues – Freepik.com

#4 – Talk About Yourself

In addition to small talk, take initiative and talk about your desires, fears and hopes. Don’t take the floor for too long, and do allow your partner to join the conversation or take over if they feel like it, but don’t forget to keep your partner informed about what is going on with you. Often the best way to do this is to go on a low-key date, such as a long walk through town sans any device that could turn your attention away from your partner.

Created by Bearfotos – Freepik.com

#5 – Whisper Into Their Ear

Although this tactic could lead to anything but talking, whispering into your partner’s ear heightens intimacy, and resolves any trust issues that are between you.

Created by Pressfoto – Freepik.com

It shows you’re not afraid of healthy communication and baring your soul to reveal the most private thoughts and feelings. Whispering suggests secrecy, sharing information that is confidential and reserved only for those who are special..

#6 – Ask Questions And Mean It

Ask your partner questions during the time you spend together, and don’t assume you know the answers. A simple “how are you?” followed by a pause can start a conversation even when you go to bed in the evening after a hectic day at work.

Becca Tapert, Unsplash.

Ask it like you mean it, and listen to what your partner has to say. Ask about the things you know he/she finds important, like their hobbies, interests, or things that preoccupy their mind most of the time. Your partner will feel special, and you’ll see your communication reach new heights.

Nice! These are some stellar tips for improving communication with a significant other.

Thank you, Dating Connections, for such great advice! ♥♥♥

Guest Blogger Bio

Dating Connections is a site that offers the opportunity for you to explore a variety of dating tips, previous relationship experiences and interact with other people!

Links

Website:  http://datingconnections.org/

Blog:  http://datingconnections.org/category/blog/

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/datingconnections/

Twitter:  https://twitter.com/BoyanUlv

Google+:  https://plus.google.com/u/0/101423157749445118069

 

Thanks again! We hope to see you back on ILRB sometime. 

As always, happy reading, everyone! 😉 Have a great week!

Tips on Getting A Romantic Partner A Gift for Valentine’s Day: a guest post by Dating Connections

3 Tips on Getting A Romantic Partner A Gift for Valentine’s Day

 

Picking the right gift for your partner can be rather tricky, regardless of whether you date a cowboy, a biker, or someone else entirely, while things get additionally complicated if you’re in a relationship for quite some time and therefore lack original ideas.

PIX1861, Pixabay

They say it gets easier as time goes by, but we have to be completely honest here and tell you this is nothing but a vicious lie. Moreover, people actually want to do their best once they get to know their romantic partners well, and thus tend to get overwhelmed with thinking because they feel like nothing is good enough.

This is kind of logical if you sit down to think about it. We bet you can probably recall being afraid more than once that your choice of a gift would disappoint your partner. All because kindred spirits aren’t supposed to make gift-picking mistakes, right? And this further led you to spend crazy amounts of money and other painstaking strategies which, sadly, didn’t bring desired results.

Created by Peoplecreations – Freepik.com

But, what if we told you there’s an easy way to pick a gift for Valentine’s Day and that all you have to do is keep reading the following paragraphs? Moreover, the tips we’re about to share with you are both unisex and universal so we warmly advise you to stay tuned to find out more!

Tip #1 – Consider Their Likes & Interests

If you’ve been dating him/her for some time or the two of you are already living together, chances are you probably know their favorite TV shows, movies, comic book characters, and video games, which should significantly facilitate your gift-picking quest.

Created by Freepik

On the other hand, there are literally thousands of online shops selling various geeky-oriented merch and they are usually catering to the needs of both male and female audiences. And if you’re pretty much convinced that your bae isn’t a type of person who gets entranced at the very sight of flowers or a romantic poetry book, but wants a Thor action figure instead, we warmly suggest you stick with this option. On the other hand, you can still complement one such gift with a red rose or a box of chocolates to give it a romantic vibe and make it a bit festive.

Tip #2 – Be Inventive Without Keeping Your Brain Too Busy

That’s right. Nowadays, there are many online sellers and shops that specialize in original gifts that are the embodiment of creativity and more importantly – their sole purpose is to be there for you in the times of crisis, which can save you from a lot of pain indeed. Moreover, opting for a kind of a gift that combines authenticity, romance and humor is our warm recommendation for everyone seeking out a well-balanced Valentine’s Day gift for their significant other. These come in a range from fondue sets for two to Kinky Truth or Dare adult games but the options are basically countless nowadays, and it just takes a couple of hours of browsing online.

Tip #3 – Relaxation Gifts Are Always A Win-Win

We all have crazy long working hours these days, so going with a spa coupon or something similar can be a great gift for your partner, regardless of their gender.

Created by Javi_indy – Freepik.com

Massages are also legit, but you can be inventive as well and devise some fun coupons that will include some non-standard – at home – services. The great thing about these is that you don’t have to be skilled with Photoshop, as you can always find some interesting free templates for your coupons, come up with some fun text, then print it and voila! Free cheat tip: Pinterest is basically full of fun DIY massage coupons so go ahead and feel free to borrow some you find the most appropriate.

Ha…nice! These are some cool tips for figuring out what to get the people we love for the upcoming holiday.

Thank you, Dating Connections, for such great advice! ♥♥♥

Guest Blogger Bio

Dating Connections is a site that offers the opportunity for you to explore a variety of dating tips, previous relationship experiences and interact with other people!

Links

Website:  http://datingconnections.org/

Blog:  http://datingconnections.org/category/blog/

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/datingconnections/

Twitter:  https://twitter.com/DatingConnect

Google+:  https://plus.google.com/u/0/101423157749445118069

 

Thanks again! We hope to see you back on ILRB sometime. 

As always, happy reading, everyone! 😉 Have a great week!

A Singles’ Guide to Surviving This Valentine’s Day: a guest post by Dating Connections

A Singles’ Guide to Surviving This Valentine’s Day

 

Although Valentine’s Day is supposed to be a holiday of love and happiness, there are a lot of people out there who actually resent the date. Most of the people in question are actually single, which leads to being sick of all the lovey-dovey stuff that happens on the 14^th of February.

Alina Cerny, Flickr

But what if we told you that you don’t have to be miserable on Valentine’s Day even if you didn’t have any luck with free singles dating sites or with hooking up with someone a week prior?

In fact, there is more than one way you can turn Valentine’s Day from a day you loathe to a fun experience that might even lead you to creating some friendships or even finding love.

1. Occupy Your Thoughts

It can be really difficult to ignore the “love is in the air” vibe that always comes with Valentine’s Day simply because it’s a greatly promoted holiday and it’s something all couples you know will talk about. Still, this is no reason for you to brood throughout the whole day, as there are other things you can do instead.

For starters, the easiest thing to do in order to not kill your mood completely on that day is to occupy your thoughts with something other than Valentine’s Day.

Created by Pressfoto – Freepik.com

You can get busy with your hobby, for example, especially if it’s a creative one.

Created by Bearfotos – Freepik.com

Carpentry and sculpting can be of great help here.

Another solution is to cozy up with a cup of hot cocoa and dive into a good book. Before you know it, time will fly by while you get involved with the latest crime-thriller novel by a great writer.

Created by picjumbo – Freepik.com

2. Spend Time in Good Company

It might seem like a longshot on paper, but spending time in the company of good friends can actually be a very enviable situation if luck is on your side.

Namely, hanging out with your buddies and girlfriends that aren’t already involved with the dreaded holiday can take your mind of your love situation just as effectively as any hobby. It actually might be even better than being alone, as socializing with people you like usually brings much more benefits than isolation.

Created by Freepik

3. Meet Someone

On the other hand, we have meeting new single people. Similarly to hanging out with friends, this can be a great way to make you involved with something else rather than dwelling on your romantic drought. But wait – there’s more!

Another (possibly more important) benefit of hanging out with other singles on Valentine’s Day lies in the chance of actually meeting someone you can spend the next February 14^th with. You’re all singles there, you all dislike Valentine’s Day and none of you have anything better to do on that day – why not try to meet someone new (and single) who might just be your cup of tea and who might make you stop loathing Valentine’s Day?

Created by Freepik

Definitely some food for thought here. These are great tips for taking our thoughts away from the dreaded romantic holiday, and possibly keeping our minds open to the idea of meeting someone new.

Thank you, Dating Connections, for such great advice! ♥♥♥

Guest Blogger Bio

Dating Connections is a site that offers the opportunity for you to explore a variety of dating tips, previous relationship experiences and interact with other people!

Links

Website:  http://datingconnections.org/

Blog:  http://datingconnections.org/category/blog/

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/datingconnections/

Twitter:  https://twitter.com/DatingConnect

Google+:  https://plus.google.com/u/0/101423157749445118069

 

Thanks again! We hope to see you back on ILRB sometime. 

As always, happy reading, everyone!  😉 Have a great week!

Chivalry Doesn’t Have to Be Dead: a romance blogger post by multi-genre author Marie Lavender

Chivalry Doesn’t Have to Be Dead

 

It isn’t a reach to suppose that many romance readers spent part of their childhoods dreaming of sweeping fairytale relationships, comprised of a white knight on a steed coming to a maiden’s rescue after slaying a dragon for her.

Created by Freepik

Or, for a feminist type, perhaps she was indeed the one saving her chosen male. Why not? Such individuals not only still savor a great romantic tale, but also most likely continue to admire happy couples around them. We’re looking for that elusive ‘soul mate’. Some of us, myself included, took it a step further, and now write those sweeping romance stories that might capture readers’ hearts.

Created by Awesomecontent – Freepik.com

I always dreamt of a love that would stand the test of time, a true romance like my parents had. Not an easy love, by any means. Even in romance novels, the journey includes ups and downs, as in life. But I hoped – and yes, even prayed – to find my soul mate, someone who understood me, accepted my dreams, weathered the storms of existence with me. And I would do the same for him. I poured that yearning into my stories, telling complex tales of imperfect people who found each other despite the obstacles thrown in their direction. For it’s true that real people are flawed. We live, love, hurt, and keep repeating the cycle. That’s life. I guess it’s one reason I launched the I Love Romance Blog – to not only discover new romance novels and the talented authors who wrote them, but also to learn how other people view romance. What were their romantic adventures? What advice might they offer up to readers?

I believe that within us thrives a light, a little hope for a companion to stand up and support us during our greatest accomplishments, as well as when life just gets too crazy. A partner, so to speak.

Yet, the perfect partner isn’t a perfect person. He or she has probably done something foolish before, and they might have a few regrets. There will be similar interests, but you’ll have a few differences as well.

Created by Jcomp – Freepik.com

It’s true that I am fortunate. I found my soul mate. We’re creative people, and I love that I’ll never have to explain the intricacies of the muse to the man I love. But, there are occasional days when we disagree, when one of us tries to needle the other. I like to make plans, and my fiancé is definitely more casual about life. Though that might seem like a nutty match, it actually works because our differences make us stronger. Those little things complement each other.

Created by Peoplecreations – Freepik.com

As partners, we challenge one another, and thereby put ourselves in the other person’s shoes. We’re both Libras too; so that makes for an interesting decision-making process when it comes to trivialities such as what to eat for dinner or which film to watch for the evening. We agree on so much, and yet there are traits that make us entirely unique. Still, at the end of the day, we have treasured moments of peace, cuddling and finding comfort together when words are no longer necessary.

Created by Freepik

My point here is that whoever you imagine will be your soul mate might not be the person who ends up as the one tailor-made for you. It’s okay to be surprised. Life is unpredictable. Keep an open mind on the journey. Don’t close the door to new experiences. You just might find that your destiny turns out even better than you planned or imagined.

Created by Freepik

Be your own white knight. Open yourself to the world, and enter it with a kinder heart. And this suggestion isn’t merely because Christmastime, the season of giving, is upon us. This is a year-round request. Do something nice for your neighbor, or the next person you see on the street. Of course, you can do that without seeming like a stalker. Just be kind. Open a door for someone, offer a smile. Give that person a rose from Roses Only.

Created by Freepik

You never know how that small kindness will impact another soul, how many ways it might inspire. Perhaps by doing so, you’ve given them a small slice of hope, and it just might be enough to jumpstart them on their own new journey.

Someone out there is your perfect match, not because he or she is, in fact, perfect (no one is), but rather because that individual was made for you. When you’re both ready, at a precise moment in time, you will find the one. In the meantime, keep everyone else open to it too.

 

Romance is a dream we hold tight inside our hearts. But it’s not fictional at all. Romance can be a mere thought, a word, or an act. Something as simple as holding a person’s hand is a tactile gesture that can change your entire perspective. As reading can open new worlds us, so can our own dreams of romance. Think about the traits you might like in a mate. Someone trustworthy, dependable…perhaps inventive? Jot them all down, if you prefer. Remember not to limit your imagination, but don’t get tied down to appearances either. There are those who prefer blondes or dark-haired individuals. In reality, it’s superficial. Though it’s possible the person meant for you might have one of those specific traits, in all likelihood they may not.

Let me explain. In the dictionary, a soul mate is defined as “a person who strongly resembles another in attitudes or beliefs”. Sure, that makes sense. You’d want to have similar values if you were dating someone. The earliest known use of the word soul mate was when Samuel Taylor Coleridge implemented the term in a letter to a young lady, claiming that a person shouldn’t “settle, but rather [choose someone] whose character and sensibilities [are of] a nature suitable to [their] own”. It’s not about looks, but rather about two souls connecting.

That’s a better way of saying it, right? Opt instead for the person who is the perfect accompaniment to your own unique tune, and together you’ll create the best symphony in the world.

Created by V.ivash – Freepik.com

Anyway, that’s my take on it! ♥♥♥

Host Blogger Bio

Marie Lavender lives in the Midwest with her family and three cats. She has published 22 books in the genres of historical romance, contemporary romance, romantic suspense, paranormal romance, dramatic fiction, fantasy, science fiction, mystery/thriller, literary fiction and poetry. She is also the moderator of three blogs…the I Love Romance Blog, Marie Lavender’s Books!, and Writing in the Modern Age. She’s the proud recipient of several blogging awards and book awards. Follow Marie via her author website, varied blogs, or on Facebook, Twitter, and Google+. Her books can be located at most online booksellers.

Links

Website:  http://marielavender.com/

Blogs:  http://marielavender.blogspot.com/

http://marielavenderbooks.blogspot.com/

https://iloveromanceblog.wordpress.com/

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/marie.lavender.58

https://www.facebook.com/MarieAnnLavender

Twitter:  https://twitter.com/marielavender1

Amazon Author Page:  Author.to/MarieLavender

Goodreads:  https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/6938764.Marie_Lavender

AllAuthor:  http://marielavender1.allauthor.com/

Youtube/Book Trailers:  https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCJu8HjRVYCFOqcIoX6ZxdqQ/videos

 

Happy reading, everyone! 🙂 Have a wonderful holiday season!

Created by Sabrin_Deirani – Freepik.com

I’ll check back in for our end of the year post. 😉

 

How to Survive Holiday Stress With Your Sweetie: a guest post by Dating Connections

How to Survive Holiday Stress with Your Sweetie

 

The Christmas craze is upon us and as much as ladies love to shop till they drop with the greatest excuse of them all (it’s Christmas!), their partners are usually the ones getting the short end of the stick as a gift. Between bringing home half of Pottery Barn’s Christmas collection to capture the holiday spirit, not leaving an ounce of it for anyone else on the planet, and going all out this year in terms of gifts for family, friends, acquaintances, co-workers, neighbors, and various charity organizations, it’s no wonder your partner can feel left out as you two face the stress of the holiday season.

Created by Freepik

Let’s take a moment to reflect on an extremely important fact of life here – men don’t care for gifts.

Created by Freepik

They want to have a nice dinner with their ladies over a bottle of wine and some Star Trek (choice of movie optional). They don’t care for shopping, home decor, expensive wrapping paper or Christmas cards, no matter how cute, inspirational or uplifting you may find the latest celebrity snapchats – the holiday edition! With this painful truth in mind, we present the top ways to give your man what he really wants this Christmas season without having to spend a cent on stress relief programs for yourself.

Shower Him with Affection

Your man wants you all year long, and doesn’t care what season it is. Although you’d rather go see that latest museum exhibit only in town until mid-December between picking your company Christmas party dress and getting your hair done before the actual holiday craze even begins, he’d rather lounge around the house with you and lay low until it all passes.

Created by Freepik

Keep that in mind the next time you are faced with a tough decision whether to get him that sweater in navy blue or brown. Also, you can use these simple expectations to loosen up and relax with your man after an action-packed day, and get the best of both worlds.

Lingerie As A Gift For Him

If you absolutely must shop, buy yourself sexy new lingerie. He already has a closet full of dress shirts you keep buying that he never wears. But if you surprise him with a cute little hot pink number you’ll find yourself in a win-win kind of situation – you get to shop, and he gets to enjoy it.

Created by Freepik

When picking new bras, busties, thongs, or babydolls, keep in mind the things he likes in terms of color, shape, and size. Surprise him by showing how much you’re thinking about his needs and desires, not by getting him tickets to the Christmas ballet show. Following your successful choice of sexy lingerie that he’ll absolutely love, you won’t feel guilty about scheduling that pricey yet much needed appointment at your favorite salon that will ensure you get a stress-free and fulfilling holiday season, too.

Stay Active Throughout The Holiday Season

Regular exercise not only reduces the risk of various physical health problems, but it also puts your mind at ease by reducing the effects of depression, anxiety, stress, and a host of other mental health issues.

Created by Yanalya – Freepik.com

Find the time to decompress at the gym at least 3 times a week as this will help you unwind, lower your stress levels, and spend actual quality time with your partner later in the day. Stretching at home or during your lunch break can also boost your “happy hormones”, and increase your productivity so that you are free to go catch a movie or go for a walk with him, and forget all about the holiday stress.

Created by Bristekjegor – Freepik.com

Don’t Make Him Get Involved

If a man can’t get what he wants, the second best thing that could happen is for him to be left alone. Don’t make him go with you to pick your mom’s present or ask his opinion on every little thing you bring into the house because that is just completely pointless. He doesn’t have an opinion on it, and even if he did, it would be a man’s opinion, which in all likelihood would be contrary to yours. Show you love him by letting him be, and he will be eternally grateful.

Created by Freepik

While you’re at it, enlist the help of your friends, and have yourself a great girl’s night out to talk about all things Christmas and men over some wine and great music. You’ll feel amazing afterwards, and your partner will be happy for you both.

Definitely some food for thought here. These are great tips for staying connected with our partners, and keeping the Christmas hustle and bustle from driving us crazy.

Thank you, Dating Connections, for such great advice! ♥♥♥

Guest Blogger Bio

Dating Connections is a site that offers the opportunity for you to explore a variety of dating tips, previous relationship experiences and interact with other people!

Links

Website:  http://datingconnections.org/

Blog:  http://datingconnections.org/category/blog/

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/datingconnections/

Twitter:  https://twitter.com/DatingConnect

Google+:  https://plus.google.com/u/0/101423157749445118069

 

Thanks again! We hope to see you back on ILRB sometime. 

As always, happy reading, everyone!  😉 Have a great rest of your week!

How to Meet Your Soul Mate in This High-Tech World: a guest post by Dating Connections

Innovative Yet Safe Ways to Meet Your Soul Mate in This High-Tech World

 

We cannot escape the fact that we’re living in the world where basically everything happens online, regardless of whether we’re talking about something as trivial as food ordering or stalking our favorite celebrities on Snapchat.

Still, we can’t help but wonder how does it actually affect our own mission of finding and meeting a soul mate? Is it still mission possible in this high-tech world? Do we actually have more possibilities than before? Well, we’ll try to provide answers to some of these questions in the following paragraphs.

The Rule of Online Dating Sites

According to various findings from Gottman Relationship blog – which tackled the issue of compatibility between the partners amongst many others – some of the most popular dating sites at the moment, such as OKCupid and chemistry.com have come up with some pretty detailed personality tests that every member of the site can take in order to get matched with someone enjoying the same activities and sharing the same values as them. On the other hand, the question that inevitably poses itself is the following: does having the same views on life represent the most important factor in predicting a relationship’s success? Everything indicates it’s far more complicated than that.

Namely, the definition of “soul mate” extends beyond mere compatibility –  this is hypothetically a person who’s looking up to us and admiring us on a daily basis, but is also capable of recognizing our uniqueness, which altogether leads to increased levels of love and affection with the passage of time.

Created by Jcomp – Freepik.com

The Necessity of Excessive Self-Preparations for Meeting a Soul Mate

Believe it or not, this is crucial. The intention behind OKCupid and chemistry.com’s efforts certainly is great, but it doesn’t necessarily mean it will lead to an instant success. This could happen due to various reasons but the most important one, in our humble opinion, is definitely the one regarding the individual’s readiness to meet their soul mate. Sure, we’re always positively envious on the very notion of some couple’s happiness and properly seduced (especially the ladies) by the romanticized soul mate myth that we often see in movies and TV, but this doesn’t mean that we are actually ready to meet that special someone and thus, we send the wrong signals to the wrong people – which can potentially lead us to more unwanted emotional failures.

What to do?

Created by Iconicbestiary – Freepik.com

 

• It is our legitimate right to turn to all high-tech means, meaning the various dating sites and nifty mobile apps in order to try and find our soul mate. Still, we need to be completely honest with ourselves in terms of our own desires. Sure, it’s always great to be optimistic and frank when responding to test questions, but we shouldn’t leave it all to the case, since meeting a soul mate is actually an active process – we’re not just passive participants.

Created by Onlyyouqj – Freepik.com

• If we decide to pursue our soul mate online, we should definitely take some precautionary measures regarding our personal safety. After all, it’s not unusual for people to lie about themselves online. Sometimes, these are just white lies because we want to feel good about ourselves and the Internet provides us a chance to distort the reality a bit and thus create better and more appealing versions of ourselves.

Still, the existence of actual scammers is part of the same reality, meaning we should never share our personal data such as a credit card number or physical address to anyone prior to meeting them in person. Furthermore, it’s highly recommended to arrange a meeting in public with your online date first and then go slowly from there – and if the other side is genuinely interested in us, then they certainly won’t have anything against the idea.

Created by Peoplecreations – Freepik.com

After all, there’s no need to rush anything.

• We should not be ashamed of our true desires and aspirations. It’s perfectly okay, for instance, to seek a partner who will put us in front of everything else because we believe we deserve it. Moreover, it’s highly recommended to stick to more of these positive statements and let the universe take care of the rest.

Created by Photoangel – Freepik.com

• Getting rid of all negative thoughts from the past and solving various emotional conflicts that keep us from thriving romantically is also a must. Only then shall we be ready to start fresh with a great new person that has just entered our lives, regardless if it’s someone we met at a friend’s party or on some random dating site.

• One of the keys to success is having faith in the laws of attraction because when we believe in ourselves, we consequently radiate good vibes.

Created by Freepik

And it’s one of those universal truths that everyone enjoys the company of positive people who love themselves and are self-conscious about their virtues but are not their biggest critics when it comes to their flaws.

• Don’t wait for the future to happen to be the best version of yourself – instead, you can start doing it now. You should also have a clear image of your potential soul mate before your eyes in every moment. If you, for instance, would like to find a girl who is an outdoor person, loves dogs and reading, then you should definitely hit dog parks, take regular strolls and go to bookstores and libraries. Don’t just get lost in your fantasies while sitting on a couch; there’s a lot that depends on you.

Created by Jannoon028 – Freepik.com

So, what do you think about these tips? Have you already found that special someone? Tell us all about it in the comment section below!

Definitely some food for thought here, and these are great dating tips for the modern crowd.

Thank you, Dating Connections, for such great advice on romantic relationships! ♥♥♥

Guest Blogger Bio

Dating Connections is a site that offers the opportunity for you to explore a variety of dating tips, previous relationship experiences and interact with other people!

Links

Website:  http://datingconnections.org/

Blog:  http://datingconnections.org/category/blog/

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/datingconnections/

Twitter:  https://twitter.com/DatingConnect

Google+:  https://plus.google.com/u/0/101423157749445118069

 

Thanks again! We hope to see you back on ILRB sometime. 

As always, happy reading, everyone!  😉 And have a great weekend!

Guide to Lesbian Dating: a guest post by Dating Connections

Guide to Lesbian Dating For the Newly Out Lesbian

 

It’s tough being the new lez on the block. Not only is this still a man’s world, but it’s also powered by heterosexual societal norms that are difficult to break. Luckily, every single one of us was fresh out of the closet at some point, lost in the sea of blurred choices and possibilities that somehow always seemed to elude us.

Created by Asier_relampagoestudio – Freepik.com

Fear not because you’re in good hands. Not that long ago I was a lez newbie myself, and have first-hand information on what goes on behind the closed doors you so desperately want a key for. And I have tips for you to get it!

First off, let me say I want to focus on local dating because you need to feel comfortable on your home turf first before you embark on a journey of conquering someone else’s territory. Not that gay women are as territorial as cats, but you know, you should have your ‘hood in the palm of your hand first, a place where you’ll feel the most like yourself. A safe haven, if you will, and here are my tips on how to get there.

#1: Befriend A Lesbian

Gay or straight, women like to be pursued, and love a challenge. If it’s too easy, something’s wrong with it. If it’s secret, hidden deep in the underworld, and available only to those “in the know”, then that’s what we want! And yes, that’s what the lez dating scene is like, too. Therefore, your first step towards getting your foot through the door of those oh-so-super-exclusive-because-we’re-so-special lesbian bars and clubs is getting yourself a gay wingwoman “in the know”!

Created by Teksomolika – Freepik.com

Now is the time to talk to that weird dyke cousin of yours who’s been openly gay since high school, and knows all the nooks and crannies of the lesbian underworld. She or someone like her could introduce you to the local lesbian dating scene where you’ll take your first baby lesbian steps.

#2: Start Dating As Yourself

Your next step is to start going out on dates as yourself. This doesn’t just mean as a person who’s finally free from the constraints of a dark and dusty closet, but it also means as the person you truly are.

Created by Javi_indy – Freepik.com

If a button down shirt is your go-to piece for a night out, make sure you wear it on a date. If you’d rather be feminine and sensual, go as a lipstick lesbian. The choice is yours; just keep in mind that women love authenticity, and the more original you are, the better, as long as you allow your true self to shine.

#3: Girl-on-Girl Sex is Easy!

Boys are super easy to seduce, while trying to keep one is a whole different ball game. You feel the chemistry, the heat is there, and everything feels right, and you go and sleep with him too soon, and bam – out the door he goes…never to return.

lesbian heart – Flickr

With girls, however, things are much easier in that department. Lesbians will never slut-shame you for sleeping with them on the first date because what would that make them?! If you feel the butterflies in your stomach and you want to go for it, do it! And forget about worrying whether she’d call the next day or think you were too easy. So was she!

Trust your intuition, and let it take you places you’ve never gone before.

Created by Nensuria – Freepik.com

Awesome! Definitely some food for thought here, and these are perfect dating tips for the LGBT crowd.

Thank you, Dating Connections, for this great advice on lesbian romantic relationships! ♥♥♥

Guest Blogger Bio

Dating Connections is a site that offers the opportunity for you to explore a variety of dating tips, previous relationship experiences and interact with other people!

Links

Website:  http://datingconnections.org/

Blog:  http://datingconnections.org/category/blog/

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/datingconnections/

Twitter:  https://twitter.com/DatingConnect

Google+:  https://plus.google.com/u/0/101423157749445118069

 

Thanks again! We hope to see you back on ILRB sometime. 

As always, happy reading, everyone!  😉